aggravatedI can't believe what's been going on in the world of Tumblr, but I feel like I have to say this, so here it is.
When you spread hatred and negativity, you will get back the same amount of hatred and negativity sooner or later. You call people names, and you will be called names, as well. If you can't handle that, then don't spread hatred and negativity in the first place.
HOWEVER.
It is absolutely not right for anyone to turn this into a personal attack on anyone.
Over the years, I have disagreed and even disliked the attitudes or opinions of some people, online and offline.
But I have NEVER ever disliked these people as individual persons. In fact, I have a feeling that if I ever got to know these people in person, I'd probably like them quite well. I really do.
When I say I don't like someone's opinions, I never say I dislike or hate them, because I really don't.
Opinions are just opinions, people. Not the individuals themselves.
I realize that opinions and attitudes are all that we ever get to see online of one another, but remember that these opinions only make up a very small fraction of the individuals as a whole.
We are ALL very complex beings, with so many different backgrounds and personal issues. And behind any negative or hateful comments, there are real people with real feelings who do feel pain and hurt (unless they are real trolls and enjoy every minute of the negative attention).
So, if you want to criticize someone's opinions, criticize the opinions, not the individuals by calling them names or saying everybody hates them. If you do, you certainly don't speak for me.
I love this fandom so frigging much, but in the end, it's just a fandom, OK? Where we're supposed to unite with common love and just have fun, spread the love around, exchange opinions.
Having someone feel personally cornered and horrible as a person, no matter what they may have said, is totally out of line and shouldn't be tolerated.
2012-06-10 03:31 am (UTC)
2012-06-10 03:34 am (UTC)
2012-06-10 03:41 am (UTC)
Actually that may be a good thing.
I just hate hearing about hate in this fandom, but then since a large part of it is internet based it's not a surprise, anonymity seems to give people more of a cause to let loose their inhibitions.
2012-06-10 03:41 am (UTC)
2012-06-10 03:57 am (UTC)
2012-06-10 04:24 am (UTC)
2012-06-10 05:31 am (UTC)
Very well said post.
2012-06-10 07:02 am (UTC)
Yes that's what I'm here for having fun and spreading the love around. But I've never encountered negativity maybe too new or just oblivious but I agree with what you said if it needs to be said. <3
2012-06-10 08:42 am (UTC)
Truthfully post!
2012-06-10 08:57 am (UTC)
2012-06-10 09:05 am (UTC)
2012-06-10 09:49 am (UTC)
2012-06-10 10:30 am (UTC)
2012-06-10 10:42 am (UTC)
*hugs*
2012-06-10 11:53 am (UTC)
2012-06-10 12:15 pm (UTC)
2012-06-10 07:18 pm (UTC)
2012-06-10 12:14 pm (UTC)
2012-06-10 02:28 pm (UTC)
Just going to copy paste my comment from twitter....
2012-06-10 02:37 pm (UTC)
People have right to their opinions but... But actually mocking people(and it was happening behind backs too), not just to that specific girl... And not only on tumblr, but on twitter too and done by people I would expect to know better...>>;;; Just... disgusting all of it together...
Edited at 2012-06-10 02:44 pm (UTC)
2012-06-11 02:46 am (UTC)
2012-06-11 01:29 pm (UTC)
And you're right Val,opinions are just that,attacking the person is not nice !
2012-06-15 05:20 am (UTC)
Last year at uni, I got to befriend one of my floormates. She was an international student from Eastern Europe. I first talked to her after I noticed her in the dining commons at a crazy early hour every day and studies there until her first class, like I do. From what I talked with her, she was very kind and soft-spoken, and she and I shared the same traditional upbringing.
She was also a columnist for the school paper. One day, she published an editorial in response to the rape cases that were sprouting up at this certain area of dorms. (and yeah, it's the same one I mentioned earlier on another post of yours) She wrote that these cases could have been prevented if the female residents weren't at the drinking parties wearing revealing clothing and getting intoxicated.
Now, our university is very, very liberal. Therefore, once her story was published online, there was just a looooooong thread of hateful, threatening comments.
The following repercussions were just so tragic: my friend got kicked off the paper, she locked herself in her room, she stopped going to class, and she had a family member come visit her to cook for her and take care of her. But ultimately, she didn't say good-bye, and I haven't seen her since.
Now, the thing is: I understood her point in her editorial. I've been in that residential area on the weekends, and I see SO MANY girls displaying an utter lack of dignity and self-respect. SO MANY. The threat exists.
But nobody else on campus understood. They called her sick.
And so, it comes to show: that honest opinions are never safe to speak out. It is best to go along with the crowd. Cuz once somebody brings up an idea so outrageous, everyone will label the commentator as perverse.
Edited at 2012-06-15 05:22 am (UTC)
2012-06-15 07:32 am (UTC)
She was probably young and naive to think that the readers will know that she was only making suggestions so that the crimes will lessen. I don't know what the rest of the article said, but I'm wondering if she dedicated enough of her article to the condemning of the crimes. If the focus of the article was on how girls dressed and drank at night, then I think it's only natural that the readers got so angry, though.
It's like blaming the victims for the crimes committed.
This kind of reminds me of what Jeraldo Riviera said about Trayvon shooting. He said that young black and Hispanic men should avoid wearing hoodies. Now, I guess he also only meant to be helpful, but you can imagine the anger this caused within the black community as well as turned Riviera into a laughing stock (again).
But I don't think that honest opinions are never safe to speak out, though. Honesty is my best policy, and I do state my opinions honestly. However, there are CERTAIN things you should keep to yourself because of the misunderstandings they may cause. IF my friend got raped, I would NEVER ask her "Were you wearing revealing clothes?" because it's simply unkind and inappropriate.
So, while I do sympathize with your friend, I can also understand why people got so mad, especially since I'm sure some of them were the victims themselves and their close friends.
Rape should never be blamed on the victims' wearing skimpy clothes at bars late at night, as idiotic as it may be. Rape should never be blamed on the victims, period (provided that it really WAS rape).
And if you still really want to make a controversial point, you can still do so by choosing your words very very carefully, and with the understanding that you may very well receive backlash for it.